His hand hung over the button. He glared at it, as if that would change anything. No, he couldn't take her screaming either. But he was the one able to make the decision, so make it he was going to do.

Sure, he was scared. He didn't have any intention of dying. But maybe, just maybe, this was how he could scratch the surface of making up to her what he'd put her through. What he was still putting her through.

The shock hit him like a brick wall. This time he had no threshold for holding back the screams. If it weren't for the straps he would have curled up into a ball.